


i just might have a problem that you'll understand

by dearzoemurphy



Category: Happiest Season (2020)
Genre: Gen, Mid-Canon, Missing Scene, mentions of Abby/Harper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:47:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27799474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dearzoemurphy/pseuds/dearzoemurphy
Summary: When Abby leaves John at the entrance to the Caldwell home, anotherclearlyheterosexual woman takes the opportunity to introduce herself to him.Alternate scene where Riley meets John at the Christmas party while Abby is talking to Harper.
Relationships: Riley Johnson & John (Happiest Season)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 83





	i just might have a problem that you'll understand

**Author's Note:**

> I really liked this movie, but I kept hoping that Dan Levy and Aubrey Plaza would end up interacting at some point! since that didn't really happen, I'm being the change that I want to see in the world. I hope you all enjoy! <3

“So…you’re Abby’s very heterosexual ex-boyfriend?”

John spun around to see a tall, brunette woman that didn’t look very heterosexual standing beside him, swirling a glass of punch as she looked him up and down.

“I beg your pardon? Who are you?”

“Well, that’s quite a rude way of asking,” the woman said, pausing to take a sip of her drink, “But I’m Riley. I’m…a friend. Of Abby’s.”

“A friend of Abby’s? I can assure you that I would have heard of you by now if that were the case,” John said dismissively.

A sort of rage briefly flashed across Riley’s face, but she quickly regained her composure. “We just met this week. I’m also a friend of Harper’s family,” she explained.

“Oh. I guess that makes sense,” John conceded, grumbling and crossing his arms.

“You guess, huh?” Riley said with a short laugh, “Well, what’s your name?”

“I try not to make a habit of volunteering personal information to strangers.”

“But you asked me for my name first…?”

John gave a slightly dramatic sigh and a very dramatic eye roll. “I didn’t ask you what your name was, I asked who you were. There _is_ a difference,” he said. Riley narrowed her eyes at him as she took another sip from her glass. He narrowed his eyes right back, but nevertheless felt compelled to add, “My name is John. I’m also Abby’s friend.”

“No, you’re her heterosexual ex-boyfriend, right? I’ve heard a little bit about you,” Riley said, a wry smile spreading across her face.

“Yup. Here to win her back,” he said sarcastically.

“Well, while your extremely heterosexual love is occupied, can I get you a drink?”

“Mmm, I don’t know…”

“C’mon, I saw Harper go after her, so I think they’ll be a while.”

“Does you offering to get me a drink imply that you actually want to spend more time conversing with me?” John asked, somewhat in disbelief.

Riley shrugged and knocked back the rest of her drink. “I guess. I don’t know, this party’s been pretty boring so far. You showing up unannounced is the most exciting thing that’s happened.”

“Why, thank you.”

“Anytime, good sir,” she replied with a sarcastic curtsey, “Now, would you do me the honor of following me into the kitchen?”

John nodded. “Of course.”

As he followed Riley through the living room, he tried to get a better look at Harper’s mildly attractive ex-boyfriend. Upon closer inspection, maybe saying that he was mildly attractive was putting it mildly.

Riley noticed his wandering gaze and gave him a knowing smile. “You like what you see?”

“Psh,” John scoffed, “No. I just see why Abby felt threatened.”

She looked back down at the ground, visibly deflating a little.

_“Alright. Won’t bring that one up again,”_ he thought, making a mental note.

They reached the kitchen, Riley pushing past a shorter brunette on their way through the doorway. The two exchanged hostile glares before moving on, the other woman ignoring John entirely.

“Who was that?” he asked once she was gone.

“Sloane. She’s one of Harper’s sisters. The one with the kids,” Riley explained, “Now, what can I get you?”

“I’ll have whatever you’re having.”

“Alright, mystery punch it is!” she said. She grabbed a second glass from the counter and set it next to hers, moving to ladle a generous amount of the beverage into both glasses.

Riley held one glass out to John and gave him a slightly awkward smile. He took it with both hands and smiled back, finding something about her demeanor oddly endearing.

“So, why are you here this Christmas?” John asked, attempting to make conversation.

“My parents live here. Just visiting them. Taking a break from my studies,” she replied, leaning back against the counter.

“What kind of studies?”

“Med school.”

“Oh, cool.”

Riley gave a short, humorless laugh. “Yeah, really cool to still be taking internships and residencies while all of my friends have jobs and long term girlfriends and shit.”

“I’m sure. I mean, sometimes I just sit in my apartment and think about how awesome it would be if I was still having to train for my chosen profession,” John said with a smirk.

Riley sighed and took a large swig of her punch. “Yeah, you get it.”

They sat in silence for a moment, John looking down at his glass.

“Hey, this might be out of left field, but what do you know about Harper?”

John looked up, tilting his head to the side in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Like, what has Abby told you about her?”

He took a moment to collect his thoughts. “All I ever hear from her is how much she loves her. How much Harper respects her and treats her well and makes her feel…alive. I know that all Abby wants is to start a life with her.”

Riley nodded, keeping her gaze locked on the ground. “Yeah. I thought you might say that.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No. It’s just…it’s hard. Loving someone like that.”

“Loving someone that much? Or loving someone like Harper?” John prompted, lowering his voice.

Riley lifted her head to look at him again. “Both. Both of those things.”

He nodded, both of them lifting their glasses to drink their punch.

“Well, that just got very heavy,” John said, attempting to dispel the building tension by addressing it.

“Yeah. Sorry about that,” Riley said with another short laugh.

“No, don’t apologize. If you’re a friend of Abby’s, you’re a friend of mine. And I think you want the same thing I do.”

“And what might that be?”

“For her to be happy. And loved,” John said.

Riley nodded as she clearly was trying to keep her face from falling. “Yeah. Yeah. Um, you know what I think you should do?”

“What?”

“You should go talk to Connor. Harper’s ex.”

“Oh, I don’t-”

“Go,” Riley said, waving him away, “Thanks for making this party a little less boring. I’m sure we’ll see each other again, but I don’t want you to miss this opportunity.”

John smiled, setting his glass down and holding his hand out to her. She took it and shook it firmly, her smile widening the tiniest bit.

“I hope we do see each other again. I’m glad that you were here for Abby this week.”

“Of course. Now, go,” she said, dropping his hand and shooing him away again.

He gave her a soft smile before collecting his drink, turning around, and exiting the kitchen.

_“I’ll make sure that I see her again,”_ he thought as he made his way back to the living room, _“Whether we’re helping Abby move out after Christmas or giving speeches at her and Harper’s wedding.”_

**Author's Note:**

> thank you all so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed, please leave any thoughts/opinions/etc. you may have in the comments!! hope you're also staying safe and have a good day! <3


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